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Loving and Being Loved: Self Compassion as a Pathway to Connection

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Loving and Being Loved: Self Compassion as a Pathway to Connection

Many of us can probably remember a time when we fell madly in love, convinced that our beloved was our life’s crucial missing piece. Fiery for this new person, we believed that we must be with them in order to be happy! Of course, part of the human condition is the deep desire to be seen and loved. And so, when we are marinating in the hormone cocktail of serotonin, norepinephrine, and dopamine which fuel the early infatuation stage of the relationship, we are experiencing the very real effects of the “most addictive substance on earth.1” We are easily swept……
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About the Precious Little Time, You Have Left

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About the Precious Little Time, You Have Left

A Good Girl (Who Didn’t Make It) “Alyssa was my best friend.  She was a talented musician, a graceful gymnast, a brilliant writer, and a deeply passionate human being.  She cared about people.  Love bled from every facet of her being.  When she spoke, her eyes were as sincere as her words.  And she always wanted to understand what was wrong so she could strive to make it better. But Alyssa woke up one day during her senior year in college with a strange pain in her chest.  The on-campus doctors didn’t understand why, so they referred her to a……
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My heart cried last week: Part two

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My heart cried last week: Part two

This is a continued conversation about sexual assault and why women don’t tell sooner, or ever. Last, week in part one I introduced the concept from my personal sexual abuse rear-view mirror. The words here are not meant to indict, but to shout comfort in the fact that none of us has to feel alone ever again.  Our voices heal! Last week we talked about feelings of shame. Victims of sexual harassment and sexual assault in adulthood or sexual abuse in childhood tend to feel shame because as human beings, we want to believe that we have control over what happens to……
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My heart cried last week: Part One

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My heart cried last week: Part One

The intense angry sexual assault conversations knocked down the door to my secret pain. For all intent and purposes, I am well adjusted. I live in my worthiness, I believe my circumstances are not who I am. And, my abusers have long since died.  However, on rare occasions, unpredicted triggers catch my breath in hushed fury. I ask the ghosts  “How could you? How dare you? YOU were supposed to protect me.” Yet, I never told. “The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission reports receiving 12,000 allegations of sex-based harassment each year, with women accounting for about 83 percent of the complainants. That figure……
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