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Don’t look too closely.

NX_man_magnifyingglass_sideThe famous French philosopher and mathematician René Descartes, also known as the Father of Modern Philosophy, said the words “I think therefore I am.” We have a large body of mental health research that supports the fact that our thoughts are our most powerful force.

“When you step out your door to face the world, you are a force to be reckoned with. You are confident, determined, and very much in control in most areas of your life. This is your dominant mask that the world sees, and to others, you can be quite intimidating! You chase your dreams and get what you want, at least most of the time, and this attribute makes you a natural leader. The side of you that most people do not see is your rebellious and spontaneous side or the side of you that is asking, “Is this all there is?” You can get tired of keeping everything together, and you secretly love it when someone else takes the reigns.”[1]

Many women I have mentored and coached over the years talk about the need to pretend or hide their true feelings to manage their competing roles and priorities. They often use the phrase, “I am so tired of…” or “I’m exhausted!” Masks will do that. They are unnatural.

But how do you get to a place of comfort where you don’t need a mask? Where can you truly be you?  Perhaps you are not sure who that is or what you were created to do. I have successfully used the following four-step discovery process with clients. I need to emphasize that processes have steps and steps necessarily move in both directions.


  1. Be truthfully you.
  • Look in the mirror and examine your life. Who do you see?
  • What stops you? What inspires you?
  • Clarify your beliefs and values?
  • Manage your capabilities and embrace your limitations?

If you don’t know who you are, you can’t get to where you want to go.

  1. Live Intentionally.
  • Inventory your gifts, skills, strengths, assets, treasures?
  • Evaluate, understand and balance your life.
  • Separate who you are from your circumstances.
  • Let go of belief systems that are barriers to your success.
  • Have faith after failure to try again.

Protect the opening of your mind.

  1. Fuel Your Power
  • Discover what have you been called to do?
  • Develop your plan: vision, goals, and objectives.
  • Perfect the necessary skills and discipline.
  • Engage feedback from those you trust.

Realign, reposition and restore. It is okay to be afraid if your courage is greater than your fear.

  1. 4. Walk in Your Purpose
  • Turn your attributes into actions e.g. determination, commitment, courage, patience, compassion, forgiveness, and wisdom.
  • Develop courage and believe what God says to you.
  • Realize your vision.
  • Be at peace.

Congratulations! Another dimension of life awaits the new authentic you.


    Until next time, remember,
  • You are not alone.
  • You are not your circumstances.
  • You have everything within you to live a purpose-filled life.

is a best selling author, Breakthrough Speaker and Spiritual coach. She has spent the last fifteen years mentoring and coaching those needing direction and support in the areas of life skills, leadership development, effective and efficient communications, and improved self-image. Connect with Tyra to get the support and help you need. Contact Info: Tyra Garlington Email: For Bookings and Inquiries: (813) 994-9462 As a Breakthrough Coach, Spiritual Coach and Christian Coach, Tyra offers a variety of breakthrough services including but not limited to: Personal Empowerment Coach :: Spiritual Coaching :: Breakthrough Coaching :: Christian Speaker :: Professional Speaker :: Breakthrough Speaker :: Personal Empowerment Speaker

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Tyra's intuition and ability to coach you beyond the pain of your past and inspire you to do the work
necessary to step boldly into your future is phenomenal. She is one of the wisest women I know and I
am delighted to have her in my corner, cheering me on along the way. With Tyra on my side, I am confident that I will move through the challenges life brings.”

Lethia Owens, President/CEO, Game Changers International, Inc.

Disclaimer - Coaching services provide support, guidance and insight for clients and should in no way be viewed as professional counseling or therapy. It should be noted that with any coaching session, outcomes have many intervening variables and many possible outcomes.

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